The Life Conspiracy

WARNING: THIS TROLLPASTA CREEPYPASTA IS 100% REALISTIC. THATS RIGHT, ITS SO REALISTIC IT'S WRITTEN IN BOLD. IF YOU FLOP AROUND LIKE A FISH IF YOU READ THIS, SEND ALL COMPLAINTS TO ihavenolife@mememail.com THANK YOU.

P.S: THIS HAS ABSOLUTELY NO CLICHES AT ALL. Just kidding. There's more than 10000000+ cliches on this page alone.

I was around 8 year olds when I first got to ~~watch porn~~ play games on my new telly. I was having a lot of fun as I played Hong Kong 97 on my SNES as I contemplated why I even played this game in the first place. I also contemplated why I even have a television, as I was actually a 37-year old man living in a fridge in an alleyway in Colarado. As I continued to imagine stuff, I remembered that I had just ate Nandos and I need to take a shit, so I jumped 8000 m and jumped on someones head and hyper-realistic blood spread everywhere, and Jeff the Killer shot someone and a riot occured at a local shopping store and as JTK started to kill my SNES, Hong Kong 97 turned into a violent, narcissistic killer whale and killed JTK with a shopping bag as two planes crashed into a tower and the world ended all of a sudden.
Wait, where was I?
Oh yeah, you died.